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Stress affects everyone! Our bodies and minds both respond when we get excited, fearful, challenged or anxious. Our brain tells our bodies to get ready to deal with these feelings and gets our body ready to “flee from danger” or to stand up and “fight it”. This helps us deal with things that threaten us. Special hormones are released in our body that prepares us to be alert and respond with lots of energy. This is a good thing once in awhile, but not when adults and children are constantly dealing with stress. These raised levels of hormones can make us feel very tired, create sore muscles and make it hard to fight off illness. One group of researchers found that parents with more worries also had children who were sick more often.
Some signs of stress in children:
| Behaviours | Body | Mind | Feelings |
| Whining Crying Nail Biting Fighting Low appetite or eating more Day dreaming |
Headaches Stomach-aches Fast heartbeat Being cold Poor sleeping Tired Illness |
Forgetful Easily distracted Confused Can’t concentrate Unreasonable Can’t problem solve |
Fear Anxiety Sad or Angry Panic Overly sensitive Helpless Frustrated |
What can we do?
Eat healthy food, get lots of exercise, get enough sleep, learn to reduce or manage stress, spend time with your children, laugh a lot, ask your children if they are worried about anything and really listen to them, minimize competitive activities, provide regular routines, make a stress management list (like deep breathing) and post it where all family members can use it.
Mary Ann Avey, Parent Educator
With funding from the City of London, Childreach is pleased to present Parenting Support Circles for parents of children 1-12 years old living in the Kipps Lane neighbourhood. The next meeting is on Monday, October 26 from 9:30 to 11 a.m. at the Northbrae Hub, 335 Belfield St.
Being a parent is a joyful experience, but it can also be very stressful. Parent Support Circles give mothers and fathers an opportunity to meet other parents and recognize they are not alone. At Parent Support Circles, parents can invite guest speakers, organize activities for children and parents, talk about the worries (and excitement) of being a parent.
For more information, call Marg at 519-434-3644 x38.
Nobody’s Perfect is a free parenting program for parents of children from 0-6 years. At a Nobody’s Perfect group, you and other parents will talk about things like:
- why children act the way they do
- how to keep children safe
- what children can do at different ages
- how to keep your children healthy
- how to feel good about yourself and your kids
Free child care for children and snacks are provided.
When: Fridays, November 6 to December 18 (no class November 20)
Time: 9:30 to 11:30 a.m.
Where: Northbrae Public School, 335 Belfield St., London, ON
To register or for more information, call Marg at 519-434-3644 x38.
- Tell each child, “I love you.”
- Communicate love through gentle touch.
- Keep track of your kids; notice when they come and go.
- Talk up what your children do that’s right.
- Notice small accomplishments.
- Explain the unknown.
- Ask their opinion.
- Expect age-appropriate responsibility.
- Provide situations where your child gains confidence.
- Surround your kids with loving relatives and friends.
- Hug your child at least 4 times a day!
- Penny Parker, Positive Parenting in Action
- Watch tv with your child. Discuss the program, plot, values, and commercials. Help them distinguish between what is real and what is fantasy.
- Limit the number of hours. Log how many hours your child is watching tv, and then gradually decrease viewing time. Model the behaviour you want – in other words, don’t be a couch potato yourself! Don’t choose vacation time or a stressful time to decrease tv watching.
- Provide fun alternatives to tv watching. Don’t turn off the tv, and then request that the child clean his/her room. This is the time to buy some craft supplies or a new board game. Invite friends over or visit the library.
- Do not use tv as a reward.
- Turn off the tv when you are done watching a show. Don’t just watch anything. Choose only top-quality shows.
- Try not to use the tv as a babysitter.
- Put the tv in a remote area or cover it up. Never put a tv in a child’s bedroom or near the dining area.
- Keep puzzles, games, and building toys near the tv. They have a greater chance at being chosen over watching tv.
- Cancel cable to limit viewing options.
- Do not serve snacks or meals in front of the tv – this only reinforces the tv habit.
- Listen to the radio or story cassettes instead. Listening to a story requires active participation from the child as they create their own mental images.
- Realize that even though your child says he is bored, you do not have to entertain him/her or turn on the tv. Boredom can teach your child how to be resourceful or just give him time to think and work things out.
- Plan activities that reinforce a program’s content. For example, visit a shoe store like the one you saw on Mr. Rogers. Encourage them to make their own railroad station, store, etc.
- Extend the learning through art activities and books. Draw pictures of things they saw on tv. Find books that teach you more about sharks, etc.
- Promote active viewing. Encourage your child to sing and dance along with the tv and express their reactions to what is happening.
One on one time with children should be fun and frequent. It is important because it builds the parent/child relationship, develops trust, attachment, and security. Try spending small amounts of time, many times through the day, doing things your child likes.
Try these:
- Read a book
- Build a fort
- Cuddle or tickle
- Sing or dance
- Go for a walk
- Bake
- Colour or draw
- Go for a bike ride
- Look at family photos
Spending time as a family promotes positive relationships and develops communication. Life is busy and it can be hard to make time to do things all together, so start out small.
Try these:
- Play family games
- Hide and seek
- Walk
- Read stories
- Cook
- Watch a movie
- Talk
Mealtimes, bedtime and car rides are great for talking.
Try asking everyone these:
- Share the best part of your day?
- Share one kind thing you did today?
- If you won $100.00, how would you spend it?
- If you were Prime Minister, what would you do?
- If you were an animal, what would you be?
- My favourite colour is…..(number, animal, sport, book)
Family time and talking encourages children to be open. It develops routines where time together is a priority.
To learn more about quality time and other parenting skills, please feel free to email me directly at lmcintosh(at)childreach(dot)on(dot)ca.
Lisa McIntosh, Parent Educator
Canadian statistics say that 56% of girls 12-13 years are unhappy with their bodies and how they look; 40% of girls 9-10 have considered dieting. Why is this important? Positive self esteem is the best protection girls can have in today’s world. If she believes she is special, she will speak up for and respect herself and others.
To develop confidence in girls:
· Focus praise on her actions and effort, not just her physical features. “You had a strong voice reading the story,” “You put a creative outfit together.”
· Encourage her to praise herself and self evaluate.
· Listen respectfully to her opinions (even when they differ from yours) and acknowledge her feelings.
· Support her interests and talents.
· Teach her about fitness and healthy eating; challenge ideas of the perfect body.
· Provide sports opportunities.
· Give girls time to complete tasks before “rescuing them.”
· Watch television and read together; discuss how woman are shown. “What is realistic about these girls (not realistic)?” “What do you think (or feel) the show is saying about women?”
· Teach her to be wise about advertising.
· Choose books that show girls as smart and capable.
· Teach girls how to cook, as well as shovel snow and replace lightbulbs.
· Women should be role models for girls: speak kindly about yourself and others, model healthy body image, celebrate womanhood.
Confident girls are not mean to others because they don’t need to hurt someone to feel good inside. Children who bully lack empathy and have low self esteem.
To learn more about self esteem or bullying, please feel free to email me directly at lmcintosh(at)childreach(dot)on(dot)ca.
Written by: Lisa McIntosh, Parent Educator
For 7 days in April 2009, students and families in Middlesex London will be encouraged to push the pause button on their screens and get up and get moving! Track your physical activity time using the log sheet.
Daily physical activity is important for good health. Build more physical activity into each day and reduce the time you spend in front of screens (TV, computer, video games, cell phones, etc.)
There are many FREE activities offered to families during the week and participants can WIN great prizes!
The parenting professionals at Childreach have created a wonderful resource for families and educators. For every child to grow and develop into a healthy, capable and caring person, it is important to acknowledge that what we do today as parents impacts the kind of person a child becomes. Childreach presents … Your Parenting Toolbox DVD with ten practical tips to help parents give their children the best possible start in life. This DVD may be watched by parents to help them enhance their skills and used by professionals who support families. Copies may be purchased through Childreach for $10 each. A complementary handbook is available for an additional $2, unbound, or $5 coil-bound. For more information or to purchase, please contact Lisa McIntosh or Mary Ann Avey at 519-434-3644.
